Employee of the Month, June 2024
This is Ripper Rhino and he is June’s Employee of the Month for providing a comforting presence during times of gloom.
This is Ripper Rhino and he is June’s Employee of the Month for providing a comforting presence during times of gloom.
May’s honours are shared by Leggy and Peggy, the millipedes, for their consistently positive outlook on life. Don’t worry if you can’t tell which one is Leggy and which is Peggy, they can’t either.
There was no employee of the month in April. Everyone was very bad, lazy and cunning. I did not wish to reward such behaviour, so here’s a picture of some flowers instead.
Tiger is an old friend of mine. He’s been with me for over twenty years now. For a while he lived at the bottom of a fish tank and I’d have to scrub the algae off him every now and then. I never asked why he made this lifestyle choice. I expect he had his reasons. Later he went to stay with the model farm animals but I think he always knew he was a little too good for them.
Tiger is always willing to act as a still life model and I have several portraits of him. This one has captured the fine predatory glare in his eye. I don’t quite know what happened about the ears though, perhaps they twitched as I was drawing them.
Hello Grandfather bird, you have a poem coming you know. It will rhyme. It will be in iambic pentameter and feature several good rhymes for beard, such as ‘weird’ and ‘feared’ and maybe even ‘leered’. That’s as far as I’ve got though, sorry. In fact, your poem-to-be hasn’t even made it into the folder of abandoned verse on the computer. It’s still in my head. I think the problem could be the slightly supercilious look on your face. Perhaps you could look a little friendlier? It might help.
Here’s to the ones who just show up. Even in that post-Christmas slump. Even on those 40 degree days when the heat is melting your circuits. Little Robot, you are January’s employee of the month because you came to work when no one else did. Three cheers for you, LR, you saved January from being a complete creative washout.
Employee of the month for December is this Christmas Bunny. Don’t tell her, but it’s really as a morale booster for performing so poorly on social media. She blames the algorithm of course but I don’t think that’s enough of an explanation for why she scored so low on likes. I think that, really, she just didn’t put much effort in.
Congratulations, Gandalf, on being our first ever employee of the month.
This award is in appreciation of all the time spend sitting on the shelf
watching over me as I write. Or staring in the opposite direction. Or sleeping, as you are right now.
A heartfelt thanks is also due for your punctuality in every day reminding me of breakfast time.